Top Ten Vampire Films
1. From Dusk Till Dawn - It had evrything guns, Tarantino and Salma Hayek dancing oh yeah and Cheech Marin has like three roles.

2. Fright Night - Well it may not have been scary but it was entertaining also one of the stars went on to become a gay porn star!

3.Dracula - Some say it was the inspiration for Blackula but it wasnt some crazy guy wrote a book about this one!

4.Near Dark - Well it was scary it was modern and it had Bill Paxton! Hang on that is a bad thing...

5.Nosferatu - He was ugly he was scary he was tall he was Chris Evans? No but it was good and although it maybe old it is still a classic.

6.The Lost Boys - The eighties was bad for many things but this wasnt one of them however the hair was pretty bad but I think Ted likes the hair

7.Buffy The Vampire Slayer - The film sucked it had Luke Perry and he is a knob but it was followed by the legendary series so.....

8.Dracula 2001 - Like Dracula but worse and with more young people Johny Lee Miller have you ever made a good film apart from Trainspotting?

9. Vampire In Brooklyn - Eddie Murphy nearly commits career suicide. This was billed as a horror comedy it was just shit and Wes Craven directed! But everyone makes mistakes and looking back it doesnt seem that bad....oh wait yes it does.

10. Vampiros Lesbos - Well there wasnt much of a story this was more of a 'one handed' kind of film with ,well , Lesbian Vampires but it was still good!

the others.....

Fright Night 2 - Well it didnt have any gay porn stars in this one and it made no sense it was like if you watched the first one when you are pissed it makes no sense and just has loads of flashy 'oh my god he ate a bug' type scenes

From Dusk Till Dawn 2 - Or as I like to call it the 'shittest sequel ever' it had nothing well apart from that Liquid terminator guy and some mexicans but overall it was shit.However there was one saving feature one thing or person that made the whole experience bearable Bruce Campbell makes an appearance god bless his chin!

From Dusk Till Dawn 3 - It didnt get any better it got worse it was even less like the original it was a fucking western one day all shit films will be made this way.

Fearless Vampire Killers - It was old it was meant to be funny and it was just kinda boring. One day there will be a tv show on channel four where famous people reminise how crap films used to be and then they will show a clip of some guy farting and call it entertainment you money grabbing arty sods!

Dracula Films - There are about twenty of these starring Peter Cushing who was that commander in Star Wars and Christopher Lee who went on to do lord of the rings but to be honest they are all boring and the same who the hell came up with making Dracula some kind of sexy cool guy yeah can we say bullshit

Blacula - Yes there are actually real Blacula films but they were kind of offensive and just for black people but ours will be universal

John Carpenter's Vampires - This film may have been bearable if it were not for one of its stars being Daniel Baldwin the lazy fat ass of the Baldwin family and oh yeah there was no story just talking and vampires who bit women in certain areas

Blade - It was between this and Vampiros Lesbos for number ten but this lost out cos it wasn't as stimulting but it doesnt make this any less good it was class and now there is a sequel

Dracula Dead And Loving It - When Mel Brooks came up with the idea of doing a spoof Dracula film he must have thought 'boy oh boy they will be queing round the block for this baby' and my how wrong he was. This film managed to reach new levels of unfunnyness that could only be reached if they made another police academy film where they all sat in a room and said stuff like 'who's farted' and 'can anyone else stand on their breasts?' this was the kind of film that made you cry in pain.Mel Brooks should have been sent to a prison to make sure he wont ever make anything as awful of this. Infact you still can.This was more cakula than Blackula